First, Let’s Fire all of the Hamsters

Three of the pages in Goddess Leonie’s 2010 Workbook and Planner are set aside to make a list of 100 Things to Do in 2010.  They can be fun, goofy, serious, playful, whatever you can imagine wanting to do during the coming year.  Sounds great, doesn’t it?  It is, especially with each number whimsically drawn and colored, the pages are so enticing. It makes me happy to just look at the pretty numbers.

I am stuck on number 38 (feed koi).

While part of me knows that I don’t have to have the whole list filled out at once, and to be honest, part of me is dragging my feet so that I don’t rush through the process, I also know part of me is afraid to put some things that I may really want to do this year.

Afraid that I won’t get to do it.

Afraid that I will.

While deep inside, the little hamster who is constantly runningrunningrunning on the wheel that is my brain is yelling,  “You can’t do that, where are you going to get the MONEY to do that? Why bother even writing it down?”

And that is one reason I am stuck at number 38. 

Many of the things on my list contain the word “make” or “sell”.

I don’t want all of the things on the list to contain those words.  And yet I know there are things I want to create this year (and hey, maybe “Create” would be a better choice than “Make”, sounds a bit more lofty and maybe a bit less money grubbing) and I know that selling things that I made created helps to keep the family running, which is very important to me.

But I think the big block to filling the list is that anything which does not involve either of those words feels a bit like slacking to me.  Like I’m not taking my responsibilities seriously.  Again with the hamster:  “How can you think of having FUN when there are bills to be paid? Never mind how can you pay for something like “have a spa day”, you don’t have time to even take a “spa day” because there is work to be done first.”

I know that I am more productive overall if I allow some “me” or “fun” time to happen.  I know that my weekly day off results in lots of work the next day because I get itchy to be doing something.  I need to bring this knowledge into the space where I am making my list.  It is not only ok to have fun, it is necessary to overall happiness and, dare I say it, bliss.

I think maybe the hamster could use a vacation.

#39 Buy Hamster a ticket to Hawaii

How about you? Is anyone else working with this planner?  How is your list coming along?